This picture was sent to me last night by one of Ashleigh's roommates. It was taken only hours before she was murdered. You can see the toll taken on her from the stress, morning sickness and dehydration. That last week she was so sick. We were relieved that she was going to the shelter. This was taken while her friends were giving her a goodbye party. I remember the tears every night out of concern for her health and life. The non-stop calls from Joshua keeping us all afraid. But her beautiful smile never changed. I miss her but at least she is scared no more. Thank you Jeannie for sending me this!
My mind is thinking of 2 Mother's Days with Ashleigh. My first one Ashleigh and her sister Raechel gave me the best present ever. They sang together for me at church. My friend working the sound booth recorded it and gave me a copy. The video link below you can go hear her singing that song. At the end Ashleigh says," I love you Mommy." I've played that video hundreds of times just to hear her voice say "I love you." again.
Then there is last years Mothers Day. Josh and her w...ere suppose to come over but they didn't. They called and said they would be over the next day on Monday and send the night. Then late Sunday she called and said it would just be her. Monday morning came and she wasn't here. I tried to call but there was no answer. So, I told Raechel that I just knew something was wrong and I left to make the over an hour drive to get my daughter. Half way there she passed me. She didn't see me but I turned around, trying to catch up with her. About 3 miles from the house I caught up to her on the old gravel cut off road. She was pulled over to the side picking wild roses growing on the roadside. I remember the sunlight in her hair and her beautiful smile as I stopped. I asked her if the truck was ok; what was she doing? She started to cry. She said,"momma, I left him. He took all our money, $400 and lost it al drinking and at the casino. He didn't want me to come at all for Mothers Day and he broke my phone so I couldn't call you. He let me come because I convinced him that with the phone gone you would show up there so, he let me go. I can't go back. I don't even have any money to buy you a gift. That is why I stopped to pick these......it is the only thing I can give you. I love you so much!"
That was the first time she left him and told us of his abusing her. The beginning of the nightmare. But what a beautiful memory of that moment of my little girl picking wild pink roses. The best Mothers Day gift I had ever gotten because it was from her heart.
This year should have been her first Mothers Day with Patience. I miss and love them so much.
This is a chronicle of the grieving process at the murder of my daughter, Ashleigh Marie Lindsey and her unborn Baby Patience Lynn. They call the parentless child an orphan & the married person who loses their mate a widow/widower but what do they call a parent who loses a child? There is no word given for the parent who have seen this kind of untimely death.
Website by Ashleigh's Patience Project