Ashleigh's Patience Project

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I Will Never Forget (4 months since passing away)

11/13/2012

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It doesn't seem like 4 months has gone by. I miss you Ashleigh Lindsey. I'll never forget.......your dark brown hair and how it gently cradled your shoulders. Your smile was more exquisite than northern lights and your voice so delightful and timid at times I'll never forget.......that very last glimpse of you so full of life, seeing so much of me in you. Though years apart we had a kindred sp...irit of a mother and daughter so much a like. I'll never forget........Holding the infant years before and what we were then. You were the crystal vase that needed protection, so small and fragile. I'll never forget........Longing to feel just one more time. The love of your big bear hugs. I'll never forget........ Knowing that could never be because the end of that embrace would be the end of you in this life. And in that thought I'd never let you go. I'll never forget........Touching your innocent hand And kissing your cheek. I had to make it good because this would have to last through all the years of grief. I'll never forget.......Thinking this is it and soon nothing of you on this earth would be. I would have no one there to hold. All that I am wanted to stay with you. I'll never forget.......Watching the box that held what I loved, lowered in stone. To see them cover you in layers of dirt forever gone. I'll never forget.......How it was to not feel, like you I felt nothing. As I stood in the sun I could feel my coffin around my heart enclosed down upon me. I'll never forget.......Wanting so bad to climb aboard and join your journey. What I would have gave to lay beside you and watch light fade to dark. I'll never forget.......My world ripped and torn to pieces in those brief moments. You were my foundation without you I crumbled. I'll never forget........The day you left me and I know I shouldn't cry, for that was not our end, and this is not my goodbye. So, wait at the gate to continue our journey to never be parted again.

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    Tara Woodlee

    This is a chronicle of the grieving process at the murder of my daughter, Ashleigh Marie Lindsey and her unborn Baby Patience Lynn. They call the parentless child an orphan & the married person who loses their mate a widow/widower but what do they call a parent who loses a child? There is no word given for the parent who have seen this kind of untimely death.

    The murder of a child is even worse and puts you in a very exclusive club (for lack of a better term) and even more exclusive is to have your grandchild murdered as well. It is a STOLEN GENERATION at the hands of the man/father who was suppose to love and protect them.


    I have decided to share this journey so that other parents can see that what they feel is in no way wrong. THERE IS NO WRONG WAY TO GRIEVE! This is my personal journey.

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