I read recently that grieving parents do not live as long. I can understand why, I feel the drain on me in everyway possible. My body, my mind and my spirit received and very fatal blow. I turn on the news and everyday one more mother is crying for her child. So, today I went to downtown Dallas after my visit with Ashleigh. I went to the “Bring Our Girls Home “ Rally. In Nigeria so many mother had their daughters taken from them. The pain of that is unbearable as a mother no matter what your Nationality, Race, or Religion. I stood with these people at the Plaza praying, hoping that these girls are givin back to the mothers who cry out for help. It was a positive to my day. A way for me to stand up and say No More!
Then I met my surviving daughter, Raechel and my granddaughter, Laney for dinner at Romas. Raechel had been so supportive today. She had to work but she bought Ashleigh some roses that I took to her grave for her. Raechel also bought me a red shirt to wear to the Rally. She thought it was great for me to go and that Ashleigh would have really liked it. But what made my day more than anything else was Raechel telling me that I taught her everything she knows and how to be a good mom. I am glad she feels like I was a good mother to her. You see secretly every surviving mother struggles with this evil demon inside. It tells you daily how awful a mother you are because you couldn’t protect your child. Somedays, you can ignore the demon and others it catches you by the throat and nearly chokes the life out of you. Today was that day. But I’m still here and tomorrow is another day.
Tonight I want to let everyone know that I have added something to the Ashleigh Patience Project Website. A Grieving Mothers Blog. I went in and pulled posts from the R.I.P page and constructed a blog that shows my journey thru the grieving process but will continue from this day forward with new post. This is for anyone but especially for grieving parents so they can see that there is no wrong way to grieve! I’ve called it Stolen Generations. You can go on the site and receive each new blog by email if you like. I hope you will pass it on to other grieving parents you know. It is been a blessing to have so many who have been so supportive.
God Bless and Happy Mother’s Day,
Bring Back Our Girls Rally in Dallas, Tx